Blog Series: What is Complementarianism? Part 3: Wrestling with the Hard Texts

In this third part of our blog series on complementarianism, we want to engage honestly with some of the more difficult biblical passages—verses that, at first glance, seem to restrict women from speaking, teaching, or even participating in public worship.

Contradiction or Tension?

Let’s begin here: The Bible is full of tensions, not contradictions. When we encounter tension in Scripture, our natural tendency is often to resolve it quickly by choosing one side over the other. But doing so can lead us to an incomplete theology—a version of truth that lacks the depth, nuance, and beauty of God's full design.

One of the key principles of biblical interpretation is that Scripture interprets Scripture, and that we should let the clear interpret the cloudy. When we encounter a passage that seems confusing or unclear, we shouldn’t throw it out, but seek to understand it in light of what is said clearly elsewhere in the Bible. This principle helps us live within the tension rather than eliminate it.

We see this in many areas of Christian belief:

• Blessing and poverty: Scripture teaches that God delights to bless His people (Jeremiah 29:11; John 10:10), and yet we are also called to take up our cross, live simply, and not love material possessions (Matthew 16:24; 1 Timothy 6:10; Mark 10:23-25). This tension has led some to embrace prosperity theology on one side and poverty theology on the other. But the truth is found in learning to hold both together (Philippians 4:12-13).

• Predestination and free will: Paul powerfully teaches predestination in Romans, while Jesus says in Revelation 3:20, “I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person.” Both are true. God is sovereign, and humans have responsibility. Trying to remove the tension diminishes the richness of both truths.

The better approach is to sit with the tension, to let the Bible interpret the Bible, and to ask, “What is the whole counsel of God saying here?”

The Texts in Question

Two commonly referenced passages on this topic are:

1 Corinthians 14:34–35 (NLT)

“³⁴Women should be silent during the church meetings. It is not proper for them to speak. They should be submissive, just as the law says. ³⁵If they have any questions, they should ask their husbands at home, for it is improper for women to speak in church meetings.”

1 Timothy 2:11–12 (NIV)

“ ¹¹A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. ¹²I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet.”

At face value, these verses may sound like sweeping prohibitions against women speaking or teaching in church. But when read in context, and in light of the rest of Scripture, we discover something more complex and instructive.

Understanding 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 in Context

Just a few chapters earlier in 1 Corinthians 11:5 (NIV), Paul writes:

“⁵But every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonours her head…”

Did you catch that? Paul assumes that women will be praying and prophesying publicly in church gatherings. He doesn’t prohibit their speech; he gives instructions on how it should be done. And in 1 Corinthians 14:4,24, Paul makes it clear that prophesying is for the church, for the encouragement and edification of the gathered body. So, it’s not private prophecy Paul has in mind; it’s public, Spirit-led contribution within the gathered Church.

So how do we reconcile Chapter 11 with Chapter 14, where Paul says women should “remain silent”? In 1 Corinthians, Paul addresses many questions that the young Corinthian Church needed answering. There was confusion in the church about a number of issues. Glenn Rider points out in the paper, “Men and Women Sharing in Church Ministry,” that Paul’s main thesis in Chapter 14 is about orderly worship. All wrestling with v. 34 must be kept within that context. He argues that this text is not about banning women from speaking entirely (participation), but addressing disruption, within a context where everyone could contribute publicly (hymns, exhortation, tongues and prophecy).

Rider writes:

“This is NOT a prohibition against women opening their mouths; nor is it a ban on women teachers. The verbal form used by Paul indicates a continuous action. Paul is saying the women are not to be in control of the conversation, not to monopolize the speaking. From the second of Paul’s statements, it seems that the women of Corinth were asking a lot of questions and moving to the centre of attention. Paul says this is inappropriate. While he is specifically addressing women in the context, the principle would carry over to men as well... The passage focuses on the subject of leadership and submission.”

When we zoom out and look at the greater context of Chapter 14 (intelligible language, edifying prophecy, interpretation of tongues, a limitation to two or three prophetic speakers, instruction for others to weigh carefully what is said), it becomes clear that Paul is guiding the church towards orderly worship that will benefit everyone, and not just one or two with many questions, or those eager to stand in the lime-light.

In other words, Paul is calling for appropriate expressions of speech in public gatherings of the church, in line with God’s design for leadership, not blanket silence.

Understanding 1 Timothy 2 in Context

Similarly, 1 Timothy 2:11–12 is often interpreted as a universal ban on women preaching or teaching. But in her book, “Jesus, Justice, and Gender Roles,”  Kathy Keller argues that we must consider:

• The context of the Ephesian church, where false teaching was rampant.

• The difference between occasional teaching and assuming authoritative, elder-level oversight.

• The fact that Paul commends women who teach in other places (Priscilla, for instance, helps instruct Apollos, a male leader, in Acts 18).

Keller offers insight by pointing out that early Christian gatherings, like their synagogue counterparts, operated under a review model. In the synagogue, guest teachers could speak, but the elders evaluated their remarks. The same principle applied in the early church: there was room for general public contribution, but the elders held the responsibility of spiritual oversight and discernment. Teaching wasn’t just about speaking; it was about authority, and authority was guarded through the review and confirmation of the elders.

Keller points out that Paul’s concern is about usurping authority—about women stepping into the authoritative, governing and evaluating role of the church reserved for qualified male elders.

Again, Glenn Rider adds clarity:

“This passage [1 Timothy 2] does not say that a woman can never teach a man or preach a sermon. The language of the text says that a woman is not permitted to be the one identified and known as the habitual, perpetual teacher or leader of the church family.”

So, can women preach? At Grace Church, we believe the answer is yes—as long as they are not holding the office of elder or functioning in a way that overrides the spiritual authority of the elders.

Not a Contradiction—A Call to Harmony

Before we move on, it's worth remembering why we take time to wrestle with these passages. This is not just about theological precision or academic interest; it’s about love and faithfulness. We want to be faithful to God's Word, even when it's challenging, and faithful to how He calls His people, both men and women, to serve His Church. Wrestling with the hard texts allows us to honour God more fully, not by avoiding tension, but by learning to live within it.

We need to see the biblical witness as a whole. Women are described as:

• Prophesying (Acts 2:17; 1 Cor. 11:5)

• Teaching (Acts 18:26)

• Serving as deacons (Romans 16:1)

• Hosting churches (Acts 16:15)

• Speaking and labouring alongside Paul (Philippians 4:3)

These aren’t outliers—they are part of God’s design for how men and women serve the church together.

Complementarianism does not mean silencing women or sidelining their voices. It means understanding the difference between spiritual authority and spiritual participation. One is role-based; the other is gift-based. And as we said in Part 2, gifts are not limited by gender.

So rather than swing to extremes—either denying clear biblical boundaries or restricting women beyond what Scripture says—we want to live in the tension and walk with humility.

Our goal is to be faithful to God’s Word, open to the Spirit’s gifts, and committed to honouring one another in love.

We hope this part of the series has helped bring clarity, not just about what we believe the Bible teaches, but about the kind of church we aspire to be. A church where men and women serve side-by-side, joyfully embracing the roles God has given, for the good of His people and the glory of His name.

In Part 4, we’ll look at how complementarianism plays out in marriage and the home—another space where God’s design invites us to flourish in partnership, love, and mutual submission.

Let’s keep growing together, in grace and truth.